Friday, September 5, 2014

And so it begins...hop on this Hoodoo carousel and get comfortable.I've decided I'd rather live modestly and e

Faithful followers had to know this was coming...eventually. Followers of my work at SBNation/ Vox Media's Crimson Tide fan page (www.rollbamaroll.com) know well my exploits, and the meaning of this Hoodoo that I do.

But for the uninitiated, allow me to spin a brief yarn about what the hell it is that is going on here. You see, for low these last two years, I have made it my personal responsibility to propel my beloved Alabama Crimson Tide to football greatness through the form of personal sacrifice, or Hoodoo. That seems simple enough, no? But allow me to further probe into the nature of what has become a weekly ritual during the University of Alabama football season.

You see, we sports fans are a superstitious lot. We tend to believe that there are forces moving with hidden hands behind the scenes of every sporting event. While not nefarious enough to be deemed under the dark arts of voodoo, the belief is that through some sort of conjuring of our collected failures and embarrassments, we can as a group lift our team to favor in the eyes of the Football Gods. Our continual weekly sacrifices will continue to curry this favor, and thus far, it has worked...for the most part.

So each week on said blog, we ask readers to spill forth their personal cups of shame, either by undertaking a particularly egregious act on account of the team, or by unburdening oneself of some prior shameful deed. It is cathartic, in a way, but it serves the real world purpose of giving the Tide a better chance of rolling over its respective opponents from week to week. Or at , that's what we think.

For two years, I have taken this charge in the utmost of seriousness, pining to the entertainment (and sometimes disgust) of my fellow members of the RBR commentariat. I've poured my heart and soul into the telling of these time-tested tales, and putting these stories together has become the highlight of my week. Each week, I pen about 3500 words of contrition for the aforementioned Football Gods, spinning yarns about things in my life of which I am in no way proud. Some stories are touching, some are humorous. Many are drawn from the real life experiences that I have encountered as I've wound my way through the pathway that has become my life. Exaggerated at time, yes. But in every good lie there's a kernel of truth,

But for me, it is about more than football or telling tall tales. When I started writing these tales for my fellow commenters, it was a form of escapism. I had been cornered into a corporate job in public relations, far from my roots as a journalist and aspiring short story writer. My fire was being extinguished a little more each day, being forced to lie to members of the public for the benefit of a national non-profit that beneath the surface of its public perception of humanity and compassion, is no different than P&G or 3M. I felt swallowed whole, consumed by my run on the perpetual hamster-wheel of need...need for money to support my family of four, need for a job (even one I hated) to meet the aforementioned need... So many of us live this life, and for what?

After eight years of service to my former organization, I was RIF'd, which is the new corporate euphemism for getting the hatchet. Sure, I received a nice severance package, but it has now run out. The odds may appear long, but I've decided before I sell myself back into corporate servitude, I'm going to give this writing thing another try. I owe it to myself, I owe it to my family, and I owe it to the little aspiring seven year old artist which with I've been blessed. It's time for daddy to put up or shut up, and chase his dream relentlessly.

I figured, why only put this sacrifice before a few members of one website? Why not spread my shame further, diversify my embarrassment if you will? After all, doing so can only generate in more favor for my beloved Crimson Tide. So here, on this blog, I will unfurl this bounty of the ridiculous for the entertainment of anyone who enjoys Faulknerian sentence structure and Lewis Grizzard wit, wrapped into one Bayou-inspired bundle of verbal confession.

Here's how this will work. I will begin loading weekly Hoodoo for your entertainment. In these initial weeks of this particular venue, I'll begin to pepper in tales of Hoodoos past, just to bring you folks all up-to-speed. Newcomers will have a little catching up to do, but I hope that within the first month, we will all be rowing the same boat.

You'll notice in the opening of each tale, I'll go on a bit about the opponent Alabama will be facing this week. For example, last week the Tide faced West Virginia, this week they will face Florida Atlantic. So there will be a football-based introduction to each article that may seem a little out of place, but you'll smart folk will catch on quickly. Don't be afraid if sports are not your thing, as these posts will have little to do with football in general. There's really no way for me to explain it, so I'll just ask you to give me enough spool to spin my yarn and I think it will explain itself.

Join me, if you will, as I initiate you plebes into the cult of Hoodoo. I'll have a new one up each Friday through the football season and beyond, so please, by all means, feel free to find a comfortable spot on my porch, put up your feet, and prepare to sit a spell. Because if there's anything I do well, it's tell a tale.

Thanks for reading...and let the Hoodoo begin.


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